Dear Diana,
We miss you so much. Happy birthday, you beautiful deity. We found this talisman made in your glorious posthumous honour.
The relic was photographed in Oakdale, Dorset.
We present it to your wondrous congregation with a lot of very British Love.
Much Love,
Oh Cheers Productions
A Wondrous Collage of the Peoples's Princesses of Wales
Did you spot the cameo?
The ohcheers.com image man beak is currently away on a research mission on how to install software on a PC, but he’s found time to send us a quick update on his efforts, trials and tribulations:
Perhaps beak should get a Mac?
If a picture paints a thousands words, then a crafty Photoshop composition surely is worth a million. This years OC word count goal is going to be difficult to hit without the inclusion of my obligatory chopped images.
The weight of my second favourite bit of software has finally proven too much and broken laptop GIR-HUB72606V0. Coincidentally the same name as my old work computer. What are the chances?
Just like Laurel & Hardy, Bang & Olufsen, Marks & Spencer and Rutter & Gadd, it’s been a turbulent creative relationship for me and Photoshop. Unlike Lennon & McCartney, mind, we still hope to get back together and make beautiful love, and beautifuller childrens.
We hit the highs with a fully playable 20 card pack of C___ Trumps, and we successfully transplanted Ed’s head onto a procreating tortoise (only just missing out on a Turner nomination).
There were lows; the utter frustration of waiting and clicking, waiting and clicking, waiting and clicking whilst a large project file updated, rendered, applied for political immunity and saved. Eventually.
So readers (and the Turner Prize) will have to wait for the Cittie of Yorkie pub, Deal With It Hayward Gallery and Toaster Mice on the 205. And I’m going to have to learn Illustrator.
Abandoned and discarded. Someone once cared a great deal about this equipment.
VOX: “I’m so smug. I’m a VOX.”
Roland: “I’m quite smug too, but I can’t top you, VOX. It seems apt that I lie, thus, perpendicular to the ground, whilst you are appropriately upright. I hate you VOX.”
VOX: “I can see all the grit and muck on your wheels. Have you no shame, Roland?”
Roland: “What does it matter when you’re in the room, VOX? I can never be as good as you. I can never carry the warm glorious tones and even if I could, all the kids love your coolness almost as much as Orange. All I’ve got is this old skool logo.”
Roland crawls off, still side-ended, for a little cry.
Blue Chair: “Oh right. Just ignore me then. I mean, I AM actually the only one in this room that contributes anything properly productive in this messed up society by helping with the parking of bums whilst they contribute actual work and thus partake is true wealth creation in this glorious socio-capitalist economy. Whilst you two – YOU TWO! – just ponce it along with the cooler-than-thou indie kids.”
Piano: “Just calm down. You’re all pathetically short-term. What use is a chair or a valve amp or even YOU, Bicycle, when the transhumans take their rightful place as the simians’ overlords. Really, when you think about it, this really IS a very petty argument. Of course, having said that, Piano shall always prevail, just as it always has. I am CLASSICAL for a reason you losers. Ha!”
Bicycle sulks silently. He’s heard it all before and recognises the futility of partaking in Kilroy politics. “No wonder Kilroy lost his mind“, thinks Bicycle.
"Make it new!" cried Ezra Pound, "but I have flu..." pained Edna.
Modernism modernity trapped influenza nightmare teleworking makes us more separate yet more accessible. Curse you Citrix.
Catcher to read, essay to write, microplane throat – night flu tablets wink but it’s only 18:23.
No time for illness must login to work go to bed shouts IT manager more easily said than done.
STOP being so obsessive Edna.
Sleep, and the OC crew enjoys the Fringe.
While the inter-continental nature of the Oh Cheers contributors is referenced infrequently by the wider press, its primary journo-nodes (journodes) are in the Earthbound cities of Melbourne and London.
However, it is often too easy to neglect our roots, and it is with this in mind that the latest image-riffery is a nod to (some of) our origins: a glorious bicentennial settlement on the south coast of England; a town where seasides, ice creams, students and the elderly nestle together in a sticky mess of foal abuse.
Yes, we’re speaking about none other than Bournemouth. Wish you were here?
Peaceful. Too Peaceful.
So post-DIY they’re nu – and not even just nu but Nu-Nu, a retro so nostalgic it can only be from the future – Electricity In Our Homes return with an ultra-limited, 300-pressings-only release of their latest hit fandango, You’re Doing So Well, a wicked rambunkous thump with a sinister.
Yes, a sinister.
EIOH: Like Zebras
What great lyrics and mood: it kicks off with “I feel lucky that nothing fell; / roof tiles did not come clattering down.” Talk about damage limitation (I am being lighthearted, but deft, in reference to your lyrics).
What a start.
But, actually, the start of You Are Doing So Well is prefaced with a delightfully cheeky 45 second melodic workout (overdriven, tightly reverbed drums and all, including cheekily delightful guitar twang) before certain chaospheric percusso drums commence their advancement with enough profound menace to be anyone from early Killing Joke all the way to !!! (Chik Chik Chik), leading into guitar like razor wire and vocals reminiscent of early Tripping Daisy, with an eerie backing vocal.
Possibly even the druggiest Lennon springs to mind. Is that bad? He meant well. But that’s no excuse.
Apparently Electricity In Our Homes just want to see people do well (to paraphrase their lyrics). And this appears to moves them to make music like this.
I wonder what happens when THEY want to do well. Perhaps that’s a tale for the future, if they ever choose to tell it…
EIOH have never felt so tight and nor have they sounded so well produced. May their efforts continue to lead into better things.
And this Main Protagonist found his copy arriving all personally-PostItNoted and all. The incredible joy-thrill wow was impeccable: I just had to not only take ye pictures, but in ye a neat context too.
What better place, for instance, to place such a treasured 12″ amidst one’s own guitars?
Where did I put that new EIOH single?
You too can listen to these tracks via your ear receptacles just here: http://www.myspace.com/electricityinourhomes.
BUT: despite all ye listening… see them live, buy their singles, write your own reviews. They are a good and solid articulate madness. And they represent a better way of life. They do.
The Oh Cheers Main Protagonist has had an unusual week…
Yes, yes. I was on a course this week, as per the requirements of the office employment (note: the details end there due to non-disclosure arrangements).
Who knew training could be so much fun?
Hello old friend… [click image to maximify]
Dob Day Sunrise
An intimidating interrogator… [click image to maximify]
Now listen here, fact fans: Dob and his crew intend to attend the final BBC 6Music protest this Saturday (20/05/2010). As made previously clear, we are strong supporters of the 6Music and will be madder than Hell if it is withdrawn. See you there?
Main Protagonist writes…
UPDATE IN ADVANCE OF THE FINAL CHANCE TO MAKE OUR TIME
FINAL PROTEST: SATURDAY 22/05/2010
Viz: Razor Sharp Accuracy
All of us at the Oh Cheers crew are big fans of 6Music and consider it utterly absurd it has been mooted for the axe.
If it disappears, what the Devil are its listeners supposed to listen to?
There are a whole host of ways we can support 6Music:
The suggestion to axe 6Music on grounds of competitive conflict of interest is ensconced in hypocrisy upon consideration of the mere existence of BBC Three, a TV channel which has a schedule which reads somewhat like Charlie Brooker’s satirical writings in TV Go Home from yonks ago.
6Music is a burgeoning national treasure, coming from a public service broadcaster famed throughout the world – championed by its adherents, hated by its competitors – for its relative freedom to act independently in highly competitive markets.
The chief operating officer of Absolute Radio, Clive Dickens, reckons his company could buy 6Music and run it commercially. Could this be a bluff to get the press coverage? Is it a reasonable idea? Surely it is simply best to not fix wot ain’t broke.
To great effect, this month’s Viz brilliantly captures the disappointment – no, scratch that, we mean annoyance! – that 6Music listeners share over this proposal.
It’s not the first time Terry Fuckwitt has had a go at controversial BBC developments which can, on occasion, split public opinion right down the middle.
Oh Cheers Main Protagonist concerned the world is gonna end. As if.
Voting day. If you don’t vote, make sure you know why. If you do vote, make sure you know why.
Why? THESE are the issues why…
General election? Volcanic ash? Icelandic volcano? Banking crisis? Infinite energy? Green bread? Malt? Got milk?
There is only one truth here. We Oh Cheers folk dare to print it here. Blessed are those with understanding, for they are reckoned with the truth. Oh dear.
The blue fence is to protect your precious innocent self
Yes, it’s ALIENS destroying the Houses of Parliament.
But at least health and safety legislation protects us with a nice big blue board of “danger: demolition” in the midst of it all. Nice aliens, eh?
TEOTWAWKI. Don’t be happy, just worry.
Enjoy May 6th, folks!
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